Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher (Author), William L. Ury (Author), Bruce Patton (Author)
The foundation of all great negotiation books, Getting to Yes gives you the real essence of mutual gains negotiation. It's a neat, concise, little paperback, and a fast read. It's so neat and concise, in fact, that you should buy multiple copies and hand them out to people you like - or to people you want to like you. I've read it a dozen or so times and I keep finding new insights.
The main ideas of the book are that positional negotiation is pointless, and that our negotiations should focus on interests rather than positions. As far as I'm concerned, if that's the only thing you recall from reading this book, you'll have learned something indispensable. But, by the time you finish Getting to Yes, you'll be convinced that negotiation is a simple matter of figuring out what you really want, what the other side wants, and working out the space where those interests intersect -- despite the generalizations, deletions, and distortions the other side might use to confuse you. One of the leading fundamental constructs presented in Getting to Yes - which differs radically from my own number one tenet - is "separate the people from the problem."
Getting to Yes proposes that problems exist objectively and can be analyzed on their own merits, independent of people's perceptions, attributions, and relationships. My contention is that a problem only exists to whatever extent it is perceived by the beholder. As such , there is no problem if you separate the people from it. In real life, it's impossible to disentangle people issues from discussions of "concrete substance."
Regardless of the prescriptive in Getting to Yes, real problem solving negotiations require constant simultaneous attention to the problem and the people. The skills you really need to extract and understand others' perceived interests in the context of a relationship aren't taught in Getting to Yes.
The book diagnoses the conditions that cause difficulty in negotiation, but doesn't offer all components of the cure. Nevertheless, one dose each of Sales Effectiveness Training and Getting to Yes should cure just about anything that ails any normal negotiation. As John Kenneth Galbraith says of Getting to Yes, "This is by far the best thing I've ever read about negotiation...equally relevant for the individual who would like to keep his friends, property, and income and the statesman who would like to keep the peace." What other endorsement do you need?
